Meta-Awareness: The Alchemy of Longing
Meta-Awareness: The Alchemy of Longing For two nights, I relied on natural sleeping pills, yet I still woke at 3 a.m. The last thought before waking was of him. My body remembered — the playful way he once poked my waist at the gym, the warmth of his eyes, the restraint in his gestures. I miss him. Even in the gym, as I trained, I imagined his smile from afar. In those moments, I felt he loved me — not in words, but in the silent language of presence. And strangely, I also felt that his withdrawal was a gift: an offering of space, so that I could grow into my own strength instead of leaning on him. And then I realized what was happening inside me: I was transforming longing into encouragement. I was watching myself transmute an emotion...